OneShots to Make You Smile
by blue.nails.of.an.angel
Summary: Random oneshots throughout Mark and Roger's lives that are happy, fluffy, and in no particular order. Enjoy!
1. Fight!

**So I started a new story, but this is a ONESHOT I SWEAR!**

**This idea came from my dad, who told me a story about how he and his best friend used to have random fist fights all the time. I dunno, boys are weird.**

**Don't own RENT.**

"Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!"

"Whoah!" Benny said, joining the circle next to his friends Tom and Maureen, "What happened?"

"We don' know!" Tom said, shrugging his shoulders.

"That's cause they won't even tell nobody why they're fighting!" Maureen added, annoyed.

A five year-old Mark and a much larger six year-old Roger stood in the middle of a large group of the neighborhood kids, beating each other mercilessly and screaming bloody murder. Roger had a hold of Mark's pale ears, squeezing them and yanking the poor boy's head back and fourth while Mark plunged his tiny fists into his best friend's face with an alarming intensity. Needless to say, though, Roger had the upper hand.

"How do we know when its over?" Benny asked.

"When one of dem wuns home," Tom answered, craning his neck to get a better veiw over the heads of the kids in front of them.

"I'm tired of this. I'm leaving!" Maureen said, flipping her minature curls over her shoulder as she turned and sashayed away.

Nose bleeding, Roger finally let go of Mark's ears, bawling, and backed away to wipe the blood and tears off his face.

Mark, who had had his eyes closed while he was punching his friend, caught sight of the blood and yelled. "EWWW!" He did not, however, back away, but rather ran forward and grabbed Roger's shoulders and attempted to force him to the ground. Roger, being the larger of the two, didn't fall. Instead, he grabbed Mark's shoulders and tried to force _him_ down. Neither was ready to give up, so they did a sort of dance around in a circle, arms on each other's shoulders and making figure eights and loops all over the sidewalk. It was quite funny, actually, and a few kids laughed.

"Lookit! They're dancing!" said Benny, shreiking with laughter.

"Yeah..." replied Tom, chuckling a bit himself. "Hey, we should prowbably stoawp dem..." he said, guesturing to the middle of the circle where Mark had managed to climb onto Roger's back and was kicking and screaming and beating his friend's head and shoulders, while Roger was spinning violent circles trying to throw Mark off his back. Both of them were still crying their heads off.

"WHOAHHHHHH!" Screamed Mark and Roger together as Roger got dizzy and lost his balance, toppling over and landing on top of Mark.

"GET OFF!" Mark yelled, attempting to push Roger to the ground as well, but before he could, Tom ran forward and grabbed him.

"Come awn you guys, settle down."

"HE STARTED IT!" Mark and Roger screamed, pointing to the other.

Tom sighed. "Why were you guys fighting?"

They both stood there awhile, thinking.

"Um, I don't know..." said Roger, scratching his small head.

"Me neither..." Mark added.

"You mean you were fighting for nufin!"

"Yeah..."

Tom sighed. "Okay, say sawy and give each udder a hug."

"Sorry," they mumbled, and hugged each other.

Dissapointed, the circle disbanded, leaving Tom, Benny, Roger and Mark on the sidewalk.

"HEY!" Roger shouted over the various let-down aww's coming from the spectators. "HE'S MY BESTEST FRIEND!"

"YEAH!"

And with that, the four bohemians-to-be walked prouldly down the street and home.

**I think it was kinda wordy. Thoughts?**


	2. Gay Too

**I've decided to put all my plotless oneshots together so as to not take up as much space. YAY!**

**Don't own it. **

High school was stupid. Especially for Roger. It just got in the way of everything important. His friends Tom and Mark didn't mind it though...which was also stupid. Stupid building. Stupid classes. Stupid people, especially. They couldn't understand that Roger wasn't bad, he was just extremely...outgoing. Come to think of it, nobody did, really, except Mark and Tom, and sometimes Benny.

It was this outlook on things that earned Roger a seat in directly in front of the teacher's desk in every class.

"Are we gonna do something this weekend?" Mark asked as they walked into their second period class. Or third...Roger couldn't remember.

He shrugged. "I dunno... Benny's car should be fixed by now..." He sat down in his assigned seat in the front row and Mark stood for awhile before heading to his seat at the back.

"Well, Tom wants plans so he can get out of some tutoring or something," Mark explained, "His parents want him to be valedictorian."

Roger scoffed. "I don't think they have to worry. Old Tommy won't let us down." Mark rolled his eyes and headed for his seat as the bell rang and the teacher entered.

"Hey," whispered the kid behind Roger, thumping him on the shoulder, "you talking about Tom Collins?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Okay, class... I'm sure you all studied for our quiz today, so..."

"That fag?"

"WHAT?" Roger yelled, twisting around violently in his seat and attracting the attention of the entire class, but he didn't notice. He stood up and glared at the kid. "_WHAT?_"

"You're defending him?" He said, also ignoring the attention.

"Gentlemen!" The teacher said.

"HELL YES!"

"Mr. Davis! Please!"

"Oh yeah?" said the kid as he stood up to return Roger's glare. "Well then you're gay, too!"

Roger opened his mouth to retaliate, but stopped. He closed his mouth and smiled slowly; the entire class, including the teacher, was holding its breath. The kid looked confused, and Roger sat down again.

"Yep," He said, still smiling and looking directly at the kid. "And you're the one I've got my eye on." He grinned seductively and winked as the kid's eyes widened and the class exploded with laughter.

"That's enough!" said the teacher, although it was quite obvious she thought it was funny too. "Mr. Jacobs, please take your seat."

"Ooh, Jacobs!" sqealed Roger, sounding like Maureen Johnson. "Hmm... Roger Jacobs... I love it!" The class laughed again, and the kid narrowed his eyes to glare even harder at Roger.

"Enough, I said!"

Roger turned to catch Mark's reaction, and found that he was having a fit of silent laughter. He gave Roger the thumbs-up and Roger laughed again.

For two minuites, school had been entertaining.

**This actually happened at religious education (aka Sunday school) once. One kid called another kid gay and so on and so forth.**

**Commen to the t.**


	3. The Devil in Washington pt 1

**Okay, so I haven't written in like a year, and I'm sorry. Things got crazy. Anyway, I think I'll be doing a lot more writing since it's summer now.**

**So this doesn't follow the rules of the story. It's not a oneshot, but I'm putting it here anyway because I originally intended for it to be a oneshot but it got pretty long. I'm hoping I'll be able to put up the second half soon...but I need reveiws!**

**Don't own Rent, btw.**

"That's it?" Roger asked, squinting up into the late afternoon sun at the treehouse in Benny's backyard.

"Yes, Roger, that's it." Benny answered for the umpteenth time. "Don't look so scared!"

"I'm _not _scared!" He retorted, shifting his thin blanket and pillow uncomfortably under his arm. In truth, he was terrified. It was about as high up as the roof on his one-story house, and he'd heard too many stories about his dad falling off of it to face this treehouse with complete confidence. He was also a sucker for scary stories. But of course, they couldn't know that.

"Come on, Rog, relax. Its just a treehouse!" Collins reassured him. "The chances of you falling out are slim if you're careful."

"And you can sleep against the wall if it makes you feel better." Mark teased, bringing up the rear.

"Shut up." Roger said, punching his arm.

"Come _on_, slowpokes!" Benny said, throwing his bundle of blankets up into the treehouse. "Its already getting dark!"

Collins rolled his eyes. "Yeah, hurry up before Benny goes into cardiac arrest." He followed Benny in throwing his sleeping bag and climbing up the rope as Mark leaned over to whisper to Roger.

"What's cardiac arrest?"

Roger shrugged hurled his blanket and pillow up and, thankfully, into Collins' waiting arms, then pulled himself quickly up the rope thanks to his new football muscles. After Mark had made his much slower journey up, they spread out across the rough wooden floor just as the sun began to set.

"Okay, the meeting of the eighth graders is officially in session." Benny said with another eye roll from Collins.

"Don't go all judicial branch on me, Mr. I-still-use-the-word-'slowpoke'. We're here because its the last night of summer vacation before we're the top dogs at Scarsdale Junior High and we're demonstrating our masculinity."

"Um...what?"

Collins sighed. "We're older now so we're gonna act like it."

"Oooooooh!"

"You should stop being so smart all the time." Mark said, winding his camera and putting it up to his eye to catch Collins' skeptic look.

"_Anyway_," interjected Benny, "I know exactly what we should do first!" He reached into his pillowcase and pulled out a book. On the cover was a creepy-looking skeleton and the title "True Scary Stories" in blood-red letters. Roger squirmed uncomfortably.

"Yeah!" Mark said excitedly from behind his camera.

"You know can't scare me with those stupid ghost stories, Ben, but you can try." Collins reminded him as he tried to find a comfortable spot to lean against on the rough wooden wall.

"I dunno, these are pretty good ones." He opened the book and flipped a few pages. "The first one is called 'The Devil In Washington'. You ready?"

Collins closed his eyes, relaxed. "Ready."

But forty-five minutes later...

"...and even though they searched all night, one kid was never found." Benny said in the pitch-dark of the treehouse to the frightened whimpers of his friends.

"W-what happened t-to him?" whispered Mark.

"Nobody really knows. Some people think he died and his ghost goes out at night to haunt kids like him, but most people believe he figured out how to morph into human form and is living amongst the distant relatives of his enemies, waiting and plotting his revenge..." Benny lifted the flashlight to his chin, ready to flip it on at the right moment, as he watched the silhouettes of the three boys shudder in fright. "But the scariest part of the story is..._it's me!_"

Mark, Roger and Collins all screamed as Benny flicked on the flashlight to reveal his face, contorted with evil laughter. When his friends had run out of breath, he pulled the string of the old lightbulb hanging from the ceiling and laughed so hard his eyes watered.

"I scared you SO bad! Haha!"

Mark and Roger, their faces still frozen in fear, didn't say anything, but Collins quickly re-arranged his face to a more calm expression and rolled his eyes. "I wasn't scared."

"Oh yes you were!" Benny rolled around on his back, shrieking and imitating Collins' fright. "AH! HELP ME HELP ME! SAVE ME SAVE ME! Haha!"

Collins chuckled despite himself as Mark and Roger joined in, too. Suddenly he stopped, his eyes widened in fear at the window behind Benny's head.

"What?" Benny said, now a little scared too.

"Oh my gosh..." Collins said, raising a shaking finger to point to the window. Benny whipped around and screamed. There, in the window, was a cut-out of the girl from the exorcist, conveniently planted by Collins earlier that day.

"HAHA!" Collins roared. "Who's scared now?"

Benny stopped screaming and looked at Collins as if he was going to cry. Then he busted up laughing.

"Hey!" Came a voice from the ground. Mark looked over the side and saw Benny's mom standing there in her nightdress and hair rollers, looking annoyed. She whispered loudly, "You boys better keep it down or you're all going home!"

Mark quickly pulled his head back in and Benny's took it's place. "Sorry, Mom!"

"_Goodnight_, boys!"

Benny made sure to make a big deal out of turning off the lightbulb and laying down on his sleeping bag, but kept his eyes open. He was planning to stay awake, but suddenly he was just so tired.

"Hey, guys, I'm tired."

"Yeah, me too."

"Let's go to sleep."

"Yeah..."

Roger froze. This was _not _good. If they went to sleep, his mind would wander and he'd surely get scared. On the other hand, if he told them he wanted to stay awake, he'd be considered a baby.

Unsure what else to do, he rolled onto his side and closed his eyes.

**Sooo... whadda ya think? I'm hoping it sounds better than the other stuff I've written, mostly because it's been forever and I hope I've learned something.**

**REVEIWS ARE SUPAFLY.**


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